A Limited Number Of Human Beings

A Limited Number Of Human Beings

Old Joe The Prez

Sunday morning I’m sitting at my girlfriend Joan’s dining room table. Staring at my Del. That’s right, a Del. My laptop’s a Del. Just like my phone’s a Droid. I’m not a Apple dude. Give me gobs of money and I still won’t be a Apple dude. That’s throwing your money away. Just like buying new clothes is throwing your money away. Everything I buy is either second hand or cheap.

This is why I don’t attract Fashion Models.

I don’t have any real money. Real money is GOBS OF MONEY.

That’s right. I don’t have GOBS of money. Not only do I not have Gobs of money…I never had Gobs of money. What’s more. I don’t give a shit. I’d rather be Bad than Rich…

Anyway I’m sitting here. Sunday morning. Staring at Del. Thinking I’ll do some scroll’n. Check out the Ukraine War News. Maybe even do a little Blogg’n, cuz, as you know, I’m The Gloomy Boomer. I’m just sitting here. Meanwhile Joan’s in the kitchen watching the FOX NEWS. Watch those hard asses gripe about how fucked up we are thanks to Liberals. The usual screeds.

So no big deal. I’m not listening. I’m staring at DEL.

But now I’m hearing Old Joe.

Old Joe’s throwing a Press Conference. He’s wobblin his words. Slurring shit. Talkin real slow. No surprise. It’s Old Joe. Yet I’m hearing him and he don’t sound good. I’m listening now thinking he sounds worse than usual. He sound so fucked up I prick up my ears. Finally I get up. Go to the kitchen…

Joe’s talking about his brother. Rambling and shambling. His brother’s always telling him good shit he might wanna use in front of people like he’s a stand up comedian instead of the Prez. Telling him shit from the movies. Okay…so his brother told him a good one about a John Wayne movie. John Wayne’s on his horse. The indian chief is on his horse. The Indian Chief says, “Your Pale Face is a lying dog faced pony soldier!”

A LYING DOG FACED PONY SOLDIER.

“Wha’d he just say?”

“That’s an old one,” Joan says. “He says that one a lot.”

“I don’t get it.”

“He says it to put somebody down.”

“Why?”

“Oh, for heaven’s sake. Where have you been?”

“He says that a lot?”

“Yes!”

“I don’t get it.”

He’s talking about the climate deniers,” Joan says.

“Lying dog faced pony soldiers?”

“That’s what he calls them.”

“Who?”

“THE CLIMATE DENIERS!”

Climate Change

I’m no climate denier. I believe in climate.

Do I believe in Climate Change?

Yes I do. I believe in climate change. I also believe in Zombies.

I believe Climate Deniers will rape the earth. Whereupon the Zombies will eat the brains of the Climate Deniers. Don’t take my word for this. Check it out in the Bible. You can read the bible for free. I think they call it the good book. I prefer the King James version.

Isaiah 66:15-16

For behold, the Lord will come in fire
And His chariots like the whirlwind,
To render His anger with fury,
And His rebuke with flames of fire.
For the Lord will execute judgment by fire
And by His sword on all flesh,
And those slain by the Lord will be many.

Pretty damned cool.

The Bible is chocked full of good shit.

Climate deniers beware.

But what about the Lying Dog Faced Pony Soldiers?

Come on Joe!

I’m awake now. My head’s clear. I’m thinking, what the fuck is Joe talking about?

He’s pissed at the Climate Deniers. Okay, I can dig that.

But Lying Dog Faced Pony Soldiers?

Can’t he do better than that?

Can’t he pick a better metaphor. Stop listening to his brother. Enough already with the John Wayne bullshit. All those movies that treat Indians like cartoon characters. What’s wrong with real Native Americans?

Like, say, one of them that kicked some white man ass.

Sitting Bull…sitting.

Or at least pick a quote from a film that portrays Native Americans with some intelligence.

Like say Little Big Man.

I mean, come on. No self respecting Native American ever said lying dog faced pony soldier. That’s just some made up pale face talks with a forked tongue bullshit. Native Americans were not stupid. If anything, they were stoic when it came to white people.

A limited number of Human Beings.

Chief George knew it was hopeless.

Nothing to do but die.

Let Climate Change do it’s work.

Let Zombies feast on the strays.

4 thoughts on “A Limited Number Of Human Beings

  1. Gloomy,

    Sounds bad, especially for our great white father who can’t get the cavalry to charge. Hopeless, heartless, hapless, what to do with our wagons drawn in a circle, and all the men questioning if they are men: scalp ourselves?

    No help will arrive for we are the help being awaited.. Either we save ourselves or we feed the crows our craven livers.

    I still have a few bullets left for my Winchester; and like a lot of 2nd-act-d-or-die moments, I ain’t saving the last one for myself. I’ll go down fighting the heathen….and they sure as shit ain’t red skins but paler than pale faces such as myself.

    Buffalo Stew

    Sounds hopeless, hapeless, helpless

  2. They can put down old Joe all they like. But no matter what they say he’s still a Human Being. God bless him!

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