Today is the first day of the rest of your life.

I’m thinking today could very well be the first day of the rest of my life. I was gonna say my suck-ass life. But I need to be nicer. Do I need to be nicer? Hardly. What do I give a shit? Nobody else cares, either.

Except…today I feel a little different.

A little less Gloomy.

Maybe today really is the first day of the rest of my life!

Who coined that pithy aphorism?

Nobody knows for sure.

ARTIFICIAL EYE, the know-it-all, even it don’t know for sure. It sez the aphorism is kinda maybe sorta probably attributed to this guy:

Charles E. “Chuck” Dederich. Founder of Synanon.

Yeah, that’s right. Synanon. The original Drug Rehab Outfit.

Dederich croaked a while back.

Here’s his obituary from the New York Times:

Charles E. Dederich, a reformed alcoholic who founded Synanon, the drug rehabilitation program that won widespread acclaim and amassed great wealth before it became associated with violence, died on Friday in Kaweah Delta Hospital in Visalia, Calif. Mr. Dederich, who lived in Visalia, was 83.

Founded in 1958 with a $33 unemployment check in a seedy flat in Ocean Park, Calif., Synanon eventually attracted thousands of drug addicts and dropouts from the social turbulence of the 1960’s to therapeutic communities for a course of tough, innovative treatment.

”Crime is stupid, delinquency is stupid and the use of narcotics is stupid,” Mr. Dederich once said. ”What Synanon is dealing with is addiction to stupidity.”

By 1980, with millions of dollars in donations from American businesses, vast real estate holdings, overseas branches and its own lucrative enterprises Synanon, which was exempt from Federal and state taxes as a charitable trust, had compiled assets of $30 million to $50 million, according to the estimates of law-enforcement authorities.

But the organization, which claimed credit for thousands of rehabilitations, evolved from a renowned drug rehabilitation agency into what California officials described as a wealthy, authoritarian cult.

Accounts of violence and the insistence by Mr. Dederich on forced vasectomies for men in Synanon, mandatory abortions for women and the divorce of more than 230 of its married couples who were to switch to other partners led to investigations and unfavorable newspaper publicity.

Sounds like Chuck grew Synanon into a really fun outfit!

I bet I could found a Drug Rehab Empire.

Use one my piddling Social Security checks. Set up the first meeting aboard my seedy boat. Old Scruffy. I could do that! Couldn’t I? No, I couldn’t do that. I sold my boat to Ronnie.

Ronnie owns my boat. He’s down in L.A.. divorcing his wife. He’ll be up here sooner or later. Meanwhile, I’m squatting on his boat. My former boat.

Shit.

Today was supposed to be the first day of the rest of my life.

Sunday 5 January, 2024, nine a.m., Pacific Time

I occupy the time zone on the left there. The caramel colored time zone. I’m just hanging in my time zone.

Let’s zoom in on me.

It is Sunday morning. I’m hanging at my Trumpy Girlfriend’s pad. I’m sitting at my regular spot at Joan’s dining room table. I’m gazing beyond my laptop computer screen at Joan’s television screen. She’s watching the extremely annoying Fox News Host Maria Bartiromo and the equally annoying speaker of the house of representatives Mike “pip-squeak” Johnson. They appear to be holding a rational conversation regarding the congressional agenda….

The moment a Fox News Host opens his or her mouth any semblance of rationality vanishes.

Instead we enter the Bizzaro World of D.C. comics.

In the Bizarro World of “Htrae”, (that’s Earth spelled backwards), society is ruled by the Bizarro Code which states “Us do opposite of all Earthly things! Us hate beauty! Us love ugliness! Is big crime to make anything perfect on Bizarro World!”^[2] In one episode, for example, a salesman is doing a brisk trade selling Bizarro bonds: “Guaranteed to lose money for you”. Later, the mayor appoints Bizarro #1 to investigate a crime, “Because you are stupider than the entire Bizarro police force put together”. This is intended and taken as a great compliment. Wikipedia

As you can see, I’m not actually listening to the fox news program currently airing on this fine Sunday morning, even though Joan likes to listen with the volume turned way up high. I’m wearing earplugs. I’m listening to Mozart. This background music effectively blanks out the Bizzaro conversation between Bartiromo and Johnson.

I’m glad Johnson’s voice is drowned out by Mozart.

Pip-Squeak Johnson is even more annoying than Bartiromo. Nothing about this smarmy little prick is appealing. Even Gollum, the small, slimy creature, from Lord Of The Rings, is more appealing than Mike Johnson.

The times I’ve listened to Johnson are like memories of being exposed to a swarm of fleas.

And yet, Johnson has succeeded in the current Congress. The current Bizzaro Congress. I kinda figured he’d get re-elected Speaker Of The House. Johnson succeeds even though the Republicans are a bungling majority. Incapable of legislating in a rational manner. Johnson succeeds because he’s Trump’s Puppy. What it took–all it took–to get Johnson re-elected Speaker was a couple phone calls from the future Bizzaro-In-Chief. The Cranky Old Dude was playing golf, but he took a short break from his busy schedule to “straighten out” those strutting chest-beaters grandstanding to their deranged constituents. Trump said they needed to stop grandstanding and do it his way. And of course they did. They didn’t have any choice. Trump is their leader. They gotta obey their Fuhrer.

I mean their leader!

A far-right protestor gives the Nazi salute at the Unite the Right rally in Charlottesville during 2017.

I don’t quite get it.

This Bizarro World we live in these days.

But who am I to hold an opinion?

That might land me in trouble…

Today is actually Monday

That’s right. Today’s the 6th of January.

Not the infamous 6th of January of four years ago.

This Sixth of January will be a day where nothing much happens.

A Monday.

Same time as yesterday. But a different place. Not a sunny day. Gloomy.

A gloomy Monday.

At this moment I’m hanging at the Office, completing this blog post. Gazing out the window at the fog.

What am I gonna do today?

I could do anything. I’m back to being Gloomy.

Well, for better or for worse, I’m alive.

I’m Free.

I’m part of a vast middle finger conspiracy.

That’s right.

We’ve been around for thousands of years.

Roman stone busts from Bar Hill Fort, Scotland.

People from all walks of life are part of this conspiracy.

Old dudes like me.

Respectable Grandmothers.

Otherwise nice girls.

Millions of us.

Expressing our feelings.

It’s important to let off a little steam now and then.

Otherwise you’re liable to overheat and catch fire.

Like this turkey.

As for me, I’m keeping my finger to myself for the moment.

On this, a gloomy Monday.

Still, the question remains:

Is today really the first day of the rest of my life?

Like it or not, it appears to be so.

Does this mean I can start afresh. Build my life from the ground up?

We’ll see.

Maybe it all depends on where you’re at.