Everybody wants to go to heaven. Nobody wants to die

Peter Tosh

I don’t want to die. Not just yet. I’d like to keep living. Even living the way I’m living. Here on Scruffy…sneaking aboard in the night like a creeper. I should count my blessings. Least I got walk around room, a big soft bed, a kitchen, a toilet, eelec…tricity, etc….There’s way worse than my situation.

Sharon, my ex from three or four exes back, she’s living in her car. She parks at the cemetery where her son is buried. Pulls off the road, a lonely dark road between grave meadows, and crashes out. Nobody bothers her up there. She’s got Barry with her. Her dog. My dog, Red, is buried up there in her son’s little corner. Sharon gave me permission and I sneaked him in. Good old Red. Who else? Sidney’s there too. Sidney was a mini Australian Shepard. Man, she was the smartest little dog. Sharon sneaked Sidney in right there beside Red. Did I mention Barry is still alive? Yes! he sleeps in the car with Sharon. If Sharon lives long enough I suppose Barry will be sneaked in with the others. Ashes. All of them are ashes. I need to call Sharon and see how she’s doing. I’d let her come stay on my boat but I’m not supposed to be staying on my boat…nobody’s supposed to be living on my boat.

I’m sneaking aboard…creeping along the dock in the night…like a ghost.

My Two Sisters

Is Heaven for real?

Heaven is hard to imagine. Hell is easy. Endless pain, sorrow, misery…kind of like living here on earth. But Heaven? I can’t really see it. Both of my sisters are Jehovah’s Witnesses. They believe fervently in Heaven.

They got it all figured out, my sisters.

The Bible teaches that at death the souls of believers will go to be with the Lord, and, after the resurrection, they will spend eternity in the New Jerusalem, which comes down from heaven onto the new earth. The Bible makes it clear that deceased believers are with the Lord (2 Corinthians 5:6–8; Philippians 1:23) in a spiritual realm called heaven. The ultimate destiny awaiting believers is the new heavens and new earth (Revelation 21—22). Our physical bodies will be resurrected and glorified, made perfectly fit for eternity on the new earth.

Jehovah’s Witnesses believe that only 144,000 persons since the time of Jesus can ever go to heaven, there to be co-rulers with Christ Jesus over the inhabitants of a paradise earth. They also believe that the soul dies when the body dies and must wait until the resurrection before Jehovah “remembers” the personality of the deceased and matches it to a new, physical body. Those who are part of the 144,000 will be given spiritual bodies, but everyone else will be given a fleshly body.

Got Questions. org

Okay, so I kind of get it. You die and you’re reee…cycled. Turned onto a celestial landfill. Soul mulch. But old Jehovah…he remembers you. And if you’re deserving of salvation he reee…constitutes your ass. You’re the saved sheep. Most of you get made perfect and live in perfection on a perfect new earth. But wait! There’s the rest of you, the super saved. These are people like Mother Theresa. There’s only 144,000 of you, to be succinct. You are the Quality Souls. You don’t kick it here on a perfect earth. You get to hang in heaven with God and Jesus….

Okay, I know what Earth looks like…a plain old Earth.

But what does heaven look like?

There’s a gate. Okay. The Pearly Gates.

But why do you need a gate? You got a gate up there in the clouds? That makes no sense! Then there’s this from the bible:

 Revelation 4:3  gives a majestic description of God seated on His throne. It says He shines like precious stones and there’s a rainbow around His throne that looks like an emerald. The throne emits lightning, thundering, and voices. What a sight!

Sound like a carnival ride to me. Forget about it.

The walls of the city of heaven are huge with a thickness of over 200 feet. They are made of jasper and their foundations according to Rev. 21:14, are twelve in number with the names of the twelve apostles of Jesus on them.

What’s with the walls? I don’t need 200 foot thick walls.

The walls also have twelve gates made of pearls with the twelve tribes of Israel written on them and twelve angels at their entrance

More Gates? Come on!

In John’s account through the book of Revelation, the Holy City shines with the brilliance of a precious jewel and is as clear as crystal. The streets of the city are made of a kind of gold that is as transparent as glass. You could literally make a mirror out of the golden streets.

Sounds like Las Vegas. Maybe the spirit of Elvis is playing at the Sands!

Revelations 22:2 describes a river, clear as crystal, that flows from the throne of God and of Jesus the Lamb down the middle of the city. On each side of this river grows a tree of life that yields twelve kinds of fruit every month. It is said that this river is the river of life, and contains rare healing properties.

Okay, so a river flows through it. Big fucking deal. I think maybe this description of heaven was made up by Nomads. Stuck in the desert. A river is a big deal to a Bedouin.

I give up

You’re supposed to be lucky to get into this walled city? You’re one of the 144,000 and you’re stuck in this city with old God who shines like a carnival ride. Help me out here. I think I’d rather hang with the bad people.

But Jehovah will destroy the bad ones. I don’t get it. Why get rid of the bad ones? A few bad ones here and there makes life interesting. I remember hanging with Wild Nick who by every estimation was bad, and yet he was a lot of fun. I used to laugh my ass off around Wild Nick. According to the Bible, people just like Wild Nick will be destroyed. Meaning, I imagine, they’ll be recycled into the soul mulch but won’t be reconstituted by Jehovah.

That’s a tough call.

Truly evil people are out there, I’ll admit. But most of us are just half-ass sinners. Or we’re third string do-gooders. A mix of both. Quite a few of us are mainly good, while another lot are mainly bad. But half-ass low energy good and bad. So why should we worry? It’s sad how we muddle through life like sheep. Scared something bad is waiting for us in the Afterlife.

Frankly, I think the Afterlife is overrated.

As for me. Do I fear death? I’m just trying to stay afloat here. Forget about dying. I’m worried about sinking.

I think I’ll let the Afterlife take care of itself.

If there even is an Afterlife, which I doubt. Think about it. What’re you going to do all day in the Afterlife? Stare at your left foot? Talk to God? God’s busy being a Ferris Wheel. I guess you could toss a line into the river of life. Sounds pretty boring to me.

I wonder if they have Hookers in Heaven?

I hear they have Virgins.

But they’re Virgins…